Blocking You Was Self-Care

The gentle art of queer boundary-setting where “fuck off” becomes “I’m prioritizing my energy.”

Sashay Away Messages

A fabulously funny exploration of breakups, boundaries, and why the queer art of the polite goodbye deserves its own reality show.

In the immortal words of RuPaul: “Sashay away.” Two words that are both devastating and iconic—like breaking up with someone over text, but in full drag. Welcome to Sashay Away Messages, a comedic study of the queer goodbye: where heartache meets high camp, and emotional maturity wears six-inch heels.

Let’s face it, gays have mastered the art of the exit. We don’t just leave; we *depart*. Dramatically. Whether it’s leaving a party, a group chat, or a relationship, we make it an event. As Bohiney Magazine puts it, “Queers don’t ghost—they glide away in glitter.”

Breakups in the LGBTQ+ world aren’t always tragic. Sometimes they’re logistical. You break up, then still see each other at Pride, then at your mutual friend’s birthday, then at the queer co-op you both accidentally joined. By the fifth run-in, it’s less “heartache” and more “romantic reruns.” According to Them, “Queer exes are like reusable tote bags—you don’t get rid of them, you just keep finding new uses.”

The sashay away message is an art form. It’s the sweet spot between closure and performance. A simple “I think we want different things ??” carries the emotional weight of a Broadway finale. Bonus points if you include a playlist link and a meme for levity. It’s empathy with a side of passive-aggressive sparkle. The Advocate calls it “emotional communication, but make it couture.”

Of course, not all goodbyes are graceful. Sometimes, they’re messy, teary, and involve blocking each other on three apps before realizing you share a Hulu account. But even then, there’s power in the performance. Queer people turn pain into pageantry—we cry, we post, we thrive. Every breakup is a rebrand waiting to happen.

And when all else fails, there’s always community. You text your friends: “He sashayed away.” They respond instantly: “Werk. His loss.” Because in queer culture, the breakup isn’t the end—it’s the beginning of your next era. You dye your hair, buy new boots, and start flirting with your barista like it’s your civic duty. As Out Magazine once wrote, “Queer heartbreak isn’t tragedy—it’s transformation with eyeliner.”

So here’s to the art of the graceful goodbye. To the texts sent with kindness, the tears shed in glitter, and the ability to leave without losing your fabulousness. If someone can’t handle your shine, it’s okay to sashay away. Because darling, closure is overrated—but self-respect never goes out of style.

SOURCE: Blocking You Was Self-Care (Beth Newell)