High School Installs Nap Pods
by High School Installs Nap Pods – Students Sleep Through Classes, Administration Stunned
Month: October 2025
Suburban Lawns Become Mini Golf Courses
Suburban Lawns Become Mini Golf Courses – HOA Approves Recreation, Regrets Everything
Pedestrian Traffic Lights Confuse Citizens
Pedestrian Traffic Lights Confuse Citizens – New Walk Signals Too Complex, City Admits
Library Launches Book Treadmills
Library Launches Book Treadmills – Citizens Can Now Read and Walk Simultaneously
Museum Launches Silent Disco Exhibit
Museum Launches Silent Disco Exhibit – Art Lovers Dance Awkwardly Near Priceless Paintings
City Bans Morning Jogging
City Bans Morning Jogging – Runners Required to Sleep In Instead
Mindfulness Latte Leaves Customers Meditating Too Long
Mindfulness Latte Leaves Customers Meditating Too Long – Coffee Shop Victims Achieve Enlightenment, Miss Meetings
City Mandates Fun Hour
City Mandates Fun Hour – Citizens Required to Pretend They’re Enjoying Themselves
Zoo Installs Wi-Fi for Pandas
Zoo Installs Wi-Fi for Pandas – Bamboo-Eating Bears Now Stream Entertainment
TikTok Teens Fail Staring Contest Record
TikTok Teens Fail Staring Contest Record – Generation Z Blinks at Critical Moment
Reading Skills Hit Historic Low
Reading Skills Hit Historic Low – National Literacy Crisis Worsens
San Francisco Military Presence Increases
San Francisco Military Presence Increases – Deployment Raises Community Concerns
Bisexuality Is the Ultimate Multitasking Skill
Opinion: Why Bisexuality Is the Ultimate Multitasking Skill in a Monogamous World Introduction: The Art of Loving Efficiently In a society obsessed with multitasking—checking emails …
Drag Queens Unionize
Exclusive: Drag Queens Unionize, Demand Better Wig Reimbursement and Unlimited Lip Sync Breaks Introduction: Labor Movement Gets a Makeover In a move that economists are …
Pride Parade Canceled
Pride Parade Canceled Due to Overabundance of Fabulousness – City Officials Cite ‘Too Much Slay’ Risk Introduction: When Fabulousness Becomes a Public Safety Hazard In …
What a New Study Reveals About Rainbows
by Breaking: New Study Reveals Rainbows Actually Cause Straight People to Question Their Wardrobe Choices A Bohiney.com Satirical Investigation By Roxy Blazerfield, Senior Fashion Scientist & …
Local Man Finally Comes Out as Straight
Local Man Finally Comes Out as Straight: Community Rallies with Emergency Glitter Intervention A Bohiney.com Satirical Exclusive By Roxy Blazerfield, Staff Satirist at Bohiney Magazine—Certified …
Jeffries’ Fashionably Late Endorsement
Jeffries’ Fashionably Late Endorsement – House Leader Shows Up After Everyone’s Gone Home